Here’s a sampler of some of my writing, for those of you who feel like reading it. Enjoy. ~ Ian


“Apartment 29”: I was bored sometime during the summer of 2011. So I wrote this story about vampire plants.

“Down and Out in the Mushroom Kingdom”: This is my only attempt at writing fanfiction in half a decade. It’s a story set in the Super Mario Bros. universe, which I wrote from Luigi’s perspective.

“One-Sentence Stories”: A bunch of little one-sentence short stories, inspired by Paul and Storm’s One-Sentence Songs.

“Talk To Me, Goose”: The aborted first draft of a story I wrote for my own amusement. It’s about a sentient goose that falls in love with a human woman, and it’s exactly as stupid as it sounds.


“Faces”. I don’t remember writing this poem all that much. I must not have been happy while I wrote it, because it’s pretty cynical.

“Leap Day”. A poem that I wrote to celebrate Leap Day 2012.

“Preamble: A Silent Three Parts”. This was a silly experiment, where I put the prologue from Name of the Wind into Google Translate, translated it into Chinese, and then back again.

“Rowan: A Poem of Love and the Border”. A story-poem that I wrote over winter break 2011. (There’s a prose version too, if you’re interested.)

“The Edda of Gabby Castro”. This was an epic poem that I wrote as a Christmas present for my brother’s girlfriend. It’s pretty much like Beowulf and Mad Max had a baby.

“The Lament of the Celestial Cowboy”. A poem that dates back to when I was in high school. It’s the only poem that I ever dreamed, and it’s far better than any of the other crap I was writing at the time.

“The Nihilist’s Prayer”. I hope you like depressing shit because damn is this poem depressing!


The Tragedie of Lucas Sky-Walker, Pt. II (V.2): Did I write this? What the hell was I thinking?


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