If Various Rock Bands Were Foodstuffs

Posted: March 13, 2012 in Uncategorized
Tags: , ,

The Beatles: Bread. The basic staple on which all Western food (or, in this case, rock music) is built.

Pink Floyd: Pasta. At first glance, it looks pretty boring, but then you realize that there’s way more variety in it than you think.

The Doors: Doritos. Really good to have around when you’re high.

Journey: Budweiser. The classic staple of both the working-class Average Joe and the party-crazy college student.

Queen: Potato chips. Tasty, crunchy, and fun to listen to– and I bet you can’t listen to just one song.

Talking Heads: Jello. You can’t stand still– you just have to start wiggling.

Dream Theater: Cheese. Occasionally delicious, yes, but you can’t have a diet of just cheese.

Dead Can Dance: Pho. Exotic, dark, and filling– and doesn’t get nearly as much credit as it deserves.

Fall Out Boy: Coke Zero. Sweet and fizzy, but not really substantial in any meaningful way.

30 Seconds to Mars: Cookie dough. Good to have around in case of a breakup.

Jonathan Coulton: Cup Noodles. The staple food of Geek-Americans.

Mastodon: Bacon. Sometimes you’ve just gotta have it.

Justin Bieber: Cheez-Whiz. A vile abomination that deserves to be destroyed.


~ Ian


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